boyslikegirlslikeboys:
Sooner or later, she’ll get attached to you. She’ll fall for you. She’ll cherish every moment you spend together. Once she realizes that everything you’ve done with her was a complete fraud, she’ll never be the same. She’ll cry over it several times a day. She’ll blame herself or it. She’ll be scarred. She’ll never forget what happened. She’ll be scared to fall for another guy because she doesn’t want to get hurt again.
(via thoughts-left-untold)
…when I did some embarrassing things, and looked like really childish. I wonder why I didn’t have any grown up attitudes back then. All I did was embarrass myself. And the worst, I haven’t do apologize to those whom I hurt. Until now.
I really hate myself. I can’t believe I did such things. I can’t believe I really did it.
I wish I can be someone better in future. Someone who is not childish and selfish anymore. I must restrain myself to do things that can embarrass me in future. And to do that, I must be a quiet and wise person.
Always forgive people. Be quiet, don’t be a stand out. Save the emotions for only myself and no one.
I wish I can forgive myself. I wish I can make a peace with myself.
Yo, guys! It’s been a while. Many things happened to me in these four months. Let’s sum it up!
Currently, I’m working hard with my thesis. I’m doing a research about the meaning of constructivism in graphic art on product advertisement posters in Russia in New Economy Policy period. Sounds crazy, huh? I’ve collected about 39 posters to be analyzed. -_- fyuh…! Currently working hard in second chapter now, hoho~
Oh, and the second news… I have done my snorkeling experience! My very first snorkeling at Karimun Jawa Islands, located at northern sea of Central Java, Indonesia.
And I watched the coolest and funniest detective drama last week. The title is Sherlock in 21st Century. Yup, the one with Bennedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman. Sherlock’s arrogancy was so funny!
Sherlock: Shut up!
Lestrade: I’m not saying anything…
Sherlock: You’re thinking. It’s annoying.
It’s been a while to not play games as it’s my very first interest. What I have been doing? I’m watching movies and dramas on my laptop. Addicted to it, so you can say. I get them by download it from friends. Mostly the genre of them is fantasy, adventure, thriller, and… psychological.
Yep, psychological. When there’s a war in your brain about some situations where included evidences, logic, and mixed up with lies. You have to find the truth by connecting hypothesis and turn the tables for your own victory. A game of mind.
My most recommendations are Mr. Brain and Liar Game. only Japanese dramas? So far, yes.
Mr. Brain is a TV series drama where there’s a brain scientist named Tsukumo who is a bit odd. He deducts all cases by mixed up logic and brain science, which is eventually helps him to solve the criminal cases. Liar Game is a TV series drama which is originally come from manga series with the same title, about a game where you have to lie to people in order to make yourself win and rich. But the game turns out from sacrifice people into save people when a foolishly honest girl called Kanzaki Nao take a participation in the game with a genius swindler guy Akiyama Shinichi. Together both of them going through the game and save the people around them.
Psychological. I never expected I really am addicted with this genre now, either it’s mangas, animes, dramas, or movies. I really love something that can makes me ask “Eh, why? How come? How???” and eventually become satisfied with the logical explanations that can make me say, “Oh as I expected! Oh I see!!”
…where I reach the moment that I don’t want to care to something that people called “love”. “Love in relationship”, I mean. It’s like I don’t want to care anymore, nor I have any interest to it like I was. It’s like that I changed. My feeling changed. Maybe it’s just a natural occasion like “People do change,”, or maybe this is because the trauma that I got last year with someone meant life for me. I don’t know.
This is the moment where I want to careless about love. I don’t care what people think about me regarding love. Love is just a bullshit, that’s what I think right now. It’s not like I don’t believe about love. I just think that that’s a waste of time.
I live alone.
I live for my own life.
In my own world.
And there’s no rules nor love in it.
My focus point is only my future from now on.
Not love.
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